Zen
Posts: 763 +49
Sorry I've been off the forum for over a week, but I've been dealing with something that has hit me hard. A week ago, I had to make a very tough choice and have my cat put to sleep. I tried my best to nurse mate him through what I thought at the time was simple sickness. But after the third day of my cat just laying around, weak, not eating, barely drinking and not peeing, I took him to the vet. After some x-rays and blood tests and an exam, the vet comes back on me "critical kidney failure"!
So after the verdict of what had my cat by deaths neck, the vet started popping out money numbers, the least being $1500.00 to just flush him out and a whooping $2700.00 to $3000.00 for the flush, minor surgery, medications, anti-bionics and catheter treatments. I'm not made of money, plus money lately hasn't been flowing into my bank account as easy as it once did. The Vet told me bluntly "make the choice now, for your cat possibly only has a couple of hours left to live"! Knowing I only had a couple bucks in my account and only a 20% chance of recovery after the treatment, I made the hard choice to have Smokey put to sleep.
I did my best, towards the last couple final day's, I had been up almost 50 hours straight tending to his needs and the fact that I didn't want to go to sleep and have my little guy die while I slept. I kept squirting pedialyte with a oral syringe into his mouth ever so often to try and hydrate him, but my best efforts were not enough.
I know he is in a better spot, I know he's no longer suffering, I'm happy for those facts, but I just can't get over this guilt I'm feeling. I couldn't afford to do what was needed for him and I feel guilty about that. I loved him so much, he had been apart of my life for slightly over 11 years.
All I can do is look up into the sky and keep saying "I'm sorry"!
This was Smokey, not just a cat, but a loyal little buddy.........
Love you big guy, my Son and I miss you!
So after the verdict of what had my cat by deaths neck, the vet started popping out money numbers, the least being $1500.00 to just flush him out and a whooping $2700.00 to $3000.00 for the flush, minor surgery, medications, anti-bionics and catheter treatments. I'm not made of money, plus money lately hasn't been flowing into my bank account as easy as it once did. The Vet told me bluntly "make the choice now, for your cat possibly only has a couple of hours left to live"! Knowing I only had a couple bucks in my account and only a 20% chance of recovery after the treatment, I made the hard choice to have Smokey put to sleep.
I did my best, towards the last couple final day's, I had been up almost 50 hours straight tending to his needs and the fact that I didn't want to go to sleep and have my little guy die while I slept. I kept squirting pedialyte with a oral syringe into his mouth ever so often to try and hydrate him, but my best efforts were not enough.
I know he is in a better spot, I know he's no longer suffering, I'm happy for those facts, but I just can't get over this guilt I'm feeling. I couldn't afford to do what was needed for him and I feel guilty about that. I loved him so much, he had been apart of my life for slightly over 11 years.
All I can do is look up into the sky and keep saying "I'm sorry"!
This was Smokey, not just a cat, but a loyal little buddy.........
Love you big guy, my Son and I miss you!