Resisting the urge 2 flame!

By pcnthuziast · 13 replies
Oct 21, 2007
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  1. I want the views and oppinions of mature forum posters:
    How do you resist the urge to flame especially when someone iniates it by making an ignorant comment directed at you???
  2. um, get over it, because its the internet and your not going to prove anything by having a go at somone from sitting in the safety of your own home behind your keyboard, anyone can be as tough as what they can type over the net and it doesn't get you anywhere, except probably banned from this site.

    and anyway, if you are being insulted by someone tell a mod or something
  3. this is one of those easier said than done cases. i may agree whole heartedly with the idea that flaming is useless. but i occasionally find myself flaming despite this. sometimes its too difficult to get a hold of yourself quick enough.

    for example, what i find really grinds my gears is when you write something to dispel certain points or ideas, or tell people to leave you alone altogether, but then people write stupid things anyway. they didn't take the time to read some of the other posts, or at least leave you be.

    i make it a habit to keep up to date with what's being said on the thread, and i make a more educated post because of it, and i don't attack people. but a lot of people aren't courteous enough to do so as well, so they end up ticking me off despite my best efforts.

    i hate repeating myself to other posters because it'd save me time and patience if they'd rtfp (read the frickin posts), and try to be nice to each other.

    but unfortunately, in some cases it's unavoidable. henceforth, i'm doing my best to keep myself as level-headed and calm as possible. and if i do flame by accident, i at least have the decency to apologize to everyone on the thread and tell people i wasn't thinking clearly, and mention what ticked me off in the first place.

    i'd strongly advise you to take heed from what i've learned pcnthuziast. i've come to realize that although you can't necessarily avoid flaming altogether, there are at least ways of fixing it. there's only so much you can do to prevent flaming and resist doing it yourself.

    i have as of late been taking the time to read the posts, and i don't immediately write back. i learned that i usually end up writing something stupid in my anger. so i breathe deep a second, and come up with a way to tell the guy to calm down, and list reasons why his posts weren't helpful. when and if necessary, threaten with mod action. this way, at least you can't get in trouble for flaming. because you're not flaming. the other guy is.

    sit tight and try to keep your pants on. if you find yourself unable to tell someone to chill, if you need help, there's other people around on these forums. you could PM one of us and ask what to do in the worst case. feel free to PM me if you like.
  4. Rage_3K_Moiz

    Rage_3K_Moiz Sith Lord Posts: 5,443   +38

    Well, since the comment is ignorant and this is a tech forum, you can almost always find evidence of this ignorance, whether it be saying that all motherboards come with at least an AGP or PCI Express x16 slot or saying that PCI-E and PCI-X are the same. ;)
  5. howard_hopkinso

    howard_hopkinso TS Rookie Posts: 24,177   +19

    Personal flaming is against our rules and won`t be tolerated. See our Techspot FAQ.

    If someone flames you, then simply pm a moderator with a link to the thread etc. This is far better than flaming back and won`t get you into trouble with the moderating team. ;)

    If I spot any flaming, I usually issue a warning in the thread concerned. If that doesn`t work, then deleting/editing posts/closing threads are options I sometimes use. As well as pm`ing the offending member/members.

    In extreme circumstances, I can also issue a ban, either temporary or permanent, but I like to try and avoid this if at all possible and I`d more than likely issue a warning first, that a ban would follow, unless the flaming stopped.

    Regards Howard :)
  6. Rage_3K_Moiz

    Rage_3K_Moiz Sith Lord Posts: 5,443   +38

    Sorry I wasn't very clear in my previous post. I had to hit Submit since I was getting late for class LOL. What I missed is that you should try to back up claims with proof, and do it in a polite way so as not to rub anyone the wrong way, even if they have not done so. As they say, Knowledge is Power.
  7. Cinders

    Cinders TechSpot Chancellor Posts: 872   +12

    I simply don't except that flaming is easy to do. I usually take a bit of time to compose what I'm going to say and how I'm going to say it, and it's not like am talking to you where I might easily raise my voice and let you know that you have annoyed me! Typing is much slower for me than speaking would be, (hunting and pecking ain't easy) and I self censor much more when I post compared to when I talk. I don't want to appear to be an *****, so I usually run everything I type through a word processor and check for spelling and grammar errors to the best of my ability.

    If I do decide to flame, yes I decide to flame, I usually end up calling somebody an *** in front of his friends and I usually post a picture or two to help me illustrate my point.

    For instance

    I used to be in an online gaming community where we would “discuss” just about anything about the game we all played except cheating and how to cheat. There was a well know female poster there, and she posted early and often because she was disabled, unable to work, and had a lot of free time on her hands. Many in the community liked her and many didn’t. I happened to like her. There was this newcomer to the forums who didn’t like her. He posted his disdain for her day after day until I finally “had” to chime in. I posted that he alone had dropped our average IQ by 15 points and to prove the point I quoted him just before or after he had shoved his head up his own tush. Then I posted an image of a **** and Jane book. I said that the book was written about and for him. I also stated that he was in the title of the book, but that he wasn’t a Jane but he was a ….

    For those of you who may not be familiar with **** and Jane books. **** and Jane books are simple reading and grammar books in American for very young kids. **** is a nickname for a male named Richard but **** is also a slang term for penis in American.
  8. pcnthuziast

    pcnthuziast TS Booster Topic Starter Posts: 323   +8

    To howard: I'm well aware of the rules here and have no intentions of flaming anyone. In the past any flaming I have done has been strictly defense and what I've learned from it is that responding at all puts you on their level... exactly where I don't want to be.

    Thanx to all for their insight on the matter!
  9. howard_hopkinso

    howard_hopkinso TS Rookie Posts: 24,177   +19

    I never thought you had any intentions of flaming anyone mate. The info I gave was for reference only and wasn`t aimed at you.

    I totally agree with that.

    Regards Howard :)
  10. pcnthuziast

    pcnthuziast TS Booster Topic Starter Posts: 323   +8

    I was fairly certain that you read me right, but still felt the need to clarify in general.

    BTW: You helped me with some BSODs I was having quite some time ago... thanks again for that, they are now a thing of the past!!!
  11. i just sometimes don't understand people that initiate flaming wars. i made it very clear, particularly in my introduction when i got to techspot that as long as you at least respected my views and didn't give me any crap, we'd get along fine. and in my posts, i usually post from an unbiased point of view, and i try to get people's help and advice, not their criticisms. but it's as if there were someone out there that decided "i'm gonna sign on and piss someone off today."

    its that attitude that i don't quite understand. they turned a friendly learning environment into a whose balls are bigger competition, if you'll forgive the expression. nobody expects an insult. nobody expects to be attacked about their personal views. and people expect a minimal amount of respect. it's an unwritten rule. a courtesy. why people feel the need to bypass it all is beyond my comprehension. what ever happened to the idea of treating others how you wish to be treated?

    i dunno...i feel almost as if people like that shouldn't be allowed to post. if you aren't smart enough, courteous enough, or respectful enough to show the same respect others show you, then you shouldn't be here wasting other people's time. see what i mean? it's just a gripe i've had ever since i joined the online community in general. not just techspot.

    people everywhere seem to have this huge inferiority complex and it's like they have to start a fight somewhere to prove themselves. maybe you guys agree with me, and maybe you don't. that's just how i'm seeing it. if you guys have some insight, please enlighten me.
  12. cfitzarl

    cfitzarl TechSpot Chancellor Posts: 1,975   +9

    I click out of the thread :) .
  13. AtK SpAdE

    AtK SpAdE TechSpot Chancellor Posts: 1,495

    Ditto. Its not worth the read.
  14. pcnthuziast

    pcnthuziast TS Booster Topic Starter Posts: 323   +8

    Basically all of your comments were predictable, I just wanted to "compare notes". My final words on the matter: Flaming is childish and weak and deserves no attention!!!

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