Answering tech questions

By BillAllen55 · 22 replies
Mar 14, 2009
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  1. It's been a long time since I've spent time putting together a thread of any substance. This is due to my new computer build completion and how much enjoyment I've found learning about it and discovering all of its capabilities. While digging through all of the muc and enjoying peoples feedback advising me of how little I knew of the new technology, inadvertently I ran into a fine, truly professional by the name of 'sharam' who carefully deliberately walked me through all concerns without the need to impress me with how intelligent and obviously how much more he knew about a given subject than myself. Without exception with whatever question I had he carefully patiently answered all questions without derision or sarcasm. As I shared directly to him, had it not been for his fine suggestions, likely as not I would have ended up in a shop keepers hands prior to completion.
    Why am I spending time describing this individual here? I'm only sharing this to suggest that it has not always been the case in my 'personal' experience trying to glean out tidbits of information from this forum. I have been described as being stupid, have had other suggest they felt as if my inquiries were nothing more than requests for 'hand holding' - that in fact my questions and concerns were nothing short of moronic in nature.
    I would like to address this - this feedback coming from one that I would consider not unlike most that ask questions of this forum.

    BECAUSE some one asks the same question in a different way does not give the responder the license to take out his 'one' wood and tee off on the persons question.

    As an Example:
    I asked the question regarding the Intel HSF 775 socket asking if the manufactures HSF was as effective and as easy (push in style) as an after market HSF XIGMATEK dark knight - s1283 120mm CPU Cooler in which I ultimately use ( screw in configuration)
    During ones diatribe it was described that a certain level of 'flexing' maybe needed to accomplish the installation. I would ask if you would try to imagine one that is new to such an installation imagining himself with his new MB and HSF 'flexing' his new MB to a point that will allow his manufactures HSF to install.

    Long story longer the feedback given was presented in such a flippant (I've done this a million times can't imagine anyone having a problem with it) type of manner. That I went directly to the aforementioned after market product. Carefully put on the back plate and without further ado screwed the HSF in place.

    Moral to this thread: When providing feedback to people on the forum. Make your feedback respectful explain things to them as you would like to have been explained things when you were first starting out. It never is that easy to ask questions of any type of one that obviously has more knowledge than yourself.

    Last thought would be this: IF you can not answer questions courteously directly without ones personal attitude showing up. I would suggest you go back to your tv program Jeopardy.
  2. kimsland

    kimsland Ex-TechSpotter Posts: 14,523

    Oh your example thread was in support by captaincranky
    Put it this way, his member name suits him well
    He has been "pulled up" before, the regulars here are use to his dry sense of humor, but nothing is going to change that personality :D
    I find him very supportive, but he can be a tad harsh at times in his words.

    I suspect that you are referring to the community in general though, especially with "support" members. Generally I find all support helpers (who I must note do not get paid for their time) to be quite respectful and helpful on the thousands of threads. Actually you probably would have been better off giving thanks to those that do give friendly and helpful support "Answering tech questions", of which happens less often than it should.
  3. captaincranky

    captaincranky TechSpot Addict Posts: 13,006   +2,532

    That's Great News Bill......, Now Let's Work onthe Definition on Insanity.......

    There are those that believe indulging in the same behavior time after time while expecting a different outcome, is insanity. So, be that as it may, I suppose that asking the same question over and over until you get the answer you want to hear, is merely "theme and variations" on that old cliche.

    Mr "BillAllen55's" constant refrain during most of his posting was that he, accommodates very affluent people in his line of work, and it seems that by extension that we (or rather I specifically) need be prepared to do the same for him.

    Many other support people bailed out on the first thread, notably SNGX1275
    Who incidentally bailed on page two of three. Something to be said for good sense, kudos to SNGX.

    raybay also elected to bow out on page two;
    He obviously was referring to the crankster here.

    After several pages of heat sink fan dialog, Mr. Allen still found it necessary to start another thread regarding the same issue. So, I guess we can conclude that "sharam" provided the answers required, or rather the answers expected, or the answers chosen to be believed, whatever. Blessed be to sharam.

    I have a sneaking suspicion that many of the support staff feel the way that I do about junk threads, since there was a raging debate about using a computer program to sort queries, and another about at least making an attempt to write in English, instead of some text message, broken English, or some sort of "tragically hip speak" styling. Also, several updates of our "stickies" (no post, etc.) have taken place, not that everybody reads them. Or perhaps that should say, "anybody" reads them. It's almost a given that nobody reads them until they're told to. Perhaps that's closest to the truth.

    I currently have 4 computers, which is 3 more than I actually need. Two are store boughts, (Emachines), and 2 are home builts, (by me). They don't seem to overheat, but then again I don't run them very hard. My Emachine T-5026 has (believe it or not) a factory supplied >>BOLT ON<< HSF. It runs the hottest of all 4 machines. But not because of the bolt on HSF, but because it's a Prescott P-4 in a Matx case. I reinstalled the HSF with aftermarket thermal paste, and it runs at the same temperature that it did with the factory supplied paste. My E2200/G31 Matx machine has a stock Intel HSF , with stock thermal compound, it cools fine. And my latest addition, an E7300/P45 rig, barely gets above room temperature. That's a slam dunk though, it's in an Antec 900 case running at stock speed. Here we have a decent Cooler Master after market HSF, but with the TC supplied by Cooler Master. Now Bill, can you see where I've tried to screw this up and make the machines overheat, but couldn't? I tried explaining this concept several times, regrettably without any measurable success. Fell on deaf ears, as it were. Here's the ironic part, both of the home built machines were mostly constructed in less than a day, pretty much without the assistance of our fellow Techspotters, they fired right up, and have been working ever since.

    So, with these facts, it should be apparent that I really didn't join TS just for the self serving motivation of getting my problems solved. When I needed to learn about attaching a HSF fan, I read the directions, and researched the internet, but without asking for help. This is part of a provincial view that I hold near and dear, that you can learn more with your mouth shut. Oh well, perhaps I'll get over it.

    Still, it should be regarded as a crowning achievement in patience on the part of our members, that Mr Allen's project has become a success, and in no way am I trying to detract from that. One supposes that patience is still a virtue, and I give praise to the almighty in granting me the wisdom and freedom of will to demur, so that it's not my patience which is still being tested.

    It's Saturday night and I can't help but think that there isn't anything I'd rather do on the internet than participate in a 4 or 5 page thread about which power supply to buy so that the poster can start saving to buy it next year. Or why it's probably pointless to overclock a P4 in this day and age, or (if I had the ability), to read endless "Hijack This" scan results for somebody who has gotten infections by downloading cracked games, stolen program software, and copyrighted music files. So the question becomes, what could be more fun than this, to do, for free? Wait, maybe I could read a thousand or so Intel CPU reviews @ Newegg written by people with "high technical abilities" who can't seem to get an Intel HSF installed.
    If all that fails to amuse me to my satisfaction, I could always resort to an old favorite of mine, cleaning my ears with a running soldering iron. Now, that's entertainment!

    I suppose there is some personal good that has "befallen" me with regards this matter. It has been sort of an epiphany for me when I became fully cognizant of the fact that I have not the talent, ability, or will, to withstand the role of indentured babysitter. And that I could care less how much attention anyone feels that they're entitled to. That said, you may have noticed that I have not been participating in this forum to the degree I once did. I figure that's a blessing and a relief to many, and that I should include myself in the throngs of the many. I have BillAllen55 at least in part to thank for this, so thanks Bill, and just to show you my hearts in the right place, you need not ever worry that I'll need you to help me maintain operability of one of my computers, so you need not ever feel guilty for not helping me. So meanwhile, you just keep on honing your already consummate mastery of the "squeaky wheel gets oiled first" approach to solicitation of assistance, there are many, many people here and elsewhere that will permit you the luxury of confusing kindness with personal overbearance, but remember in a pinch, I'm always your guy, and anytime you need it, I'll be here to ignore the noise.

    A final though. Remember, if all else fails RTFD! Is that helpful? Gosh I hope so.
  4. red1776

    red1776 Omnipotent Ruler of the Universe Posts: 5,224   +164

    ya know Captian, some times you thinks pretty good over there in philly. you remind me of one of my favorite authors, George Will, rock on Captian!
  5. bobcat

    bobcat TechSpot Paladin Posts: 688   +67

    While I certainly agree with the gist of the matter, i.e. that members and their questions should generally be treated with respect, I feel that it could have been expressed more briefly to attract more prospective readers.

    I further have the following comments, not directed towards the thread starter:

    1 It has not been my personal experience that advisors are impolite
    2 Some posts are poorly worded and off putting, while titles can be very unhelpful
    3 Some members, sometimes including myself, don’t go into sufficient pains to find existing threads
    4 While reading the Rules is as unpopular as reading a product’s instructions, they can both save much wasted time and effort, let alone bad mood
    5 Worst of all, some members whose questions have been answered, don’t bother to thank the advisor(s) who invested their knowledge and time in helping them.
  6. kimsland

    kimsland Ex-TechSpotter Posts: 14,523

    I note I tend to sound a bit harsh (so I've been informed many times)
    I say things like: Please do this. Please run that. Please go here. Which can often be mistaken as me being short and swift, without being conversationalist or friendly

    When I post like this, it's because I feel I need to be clear and direct. But, this may be seen as abrupt and cold, which is never (and has never been) my intention. Actually I'm a little unsure how to give directions better. Mind you I always say Please , it should be enough, but everyone's different, and you can't give totally individualized answers on a worldwide computer tech forum, and make everyone happy at the same time. Here's a good start though => Saying Thanks :grinthumb
  7. captaincranky

    captaincranky TechSpot Addict Posts: 13,006   +2,532

    The Inner Message Behind Our Most Sacred Cliches...

    It's impossible to know what circumstances spawned our popular axioms, but we certainly use them for all they're worth, applying them to the trying circumstances that each of use encounter in our daily lives. "You made your bed, now lay in it", has always been a personal favorite with me, both as a recipient, and a pronouncer thereof.

    I'm a bit stumped here though, as to which cliche would be best invoked to summarize the angst that kimsland seems to be feeling here. After all, we are in essence, apologizing for being polite.:confused: I've managed to narrow it down to two, so join in and voice your support for either, "the road to hell is paved with good intentions", or "you're damned if you do, and damned if you don't". I smell another silly, pointless, but nonetheless fun poll here in the offing, don't you?
    Well now, while there is much wisdom to be gleaned from this statement, I regret to inform the membership that I'm going to stick to stating it in my own ruder, but ever so much more succinct adapted cliche, "
    OK, I admit this medicine lacks sugar coating, but what the hay, sugar rots your teeth! See,it's for your own good! Oops, another cliche, sorry.
    So that I don't discount this as merely idealism provoked by today being Sunday, expand if you would how we might apply this to members who have had their questions answered, but still feel the need to ask them repeatedly, hoping to have them re-answered repeatedly, due to either a mental block, a sense of entitlement, simple but protracted disbelief, or the inability to accept the fact that their question has actually been answered. This would however, explain the lack of a thank you. If you don't believe that your question has been answered, there is no obvious necessity of saying thanks. Impoliteness or delusionality, you make the call.
    See, in an instance such as this, and in my own short sighted, rude, impolite, and abrupt way, I would provide an adapted cliche to explain these events, "you can lead a jack***(1) to water, but you can't make it drink". ((1) I hear tell those animals are more stubborn that horses).

    (Disclaimer) These are just impersonal, philosophical, observations, and any similarity between persons living or dead is purely coincidental.

    ROTFLOL, hopefully with the rest of my friends and the members @ Techspot.
  8. BillAllen55

    BillAllen55 TS Maniac Topic Starter Posts: 368

    While configuring my system for its initial startup I ran into issues in which the 'latest BIOS' upgrade from the manufactures page 'Gigabyte' (for Windows XP) turned out to be incorrect. I ran into issues in which the SATA drive installation instructions as to which SATA port to put the drive was inaccurate. There was the necessary instruction as to how to slip stream my original copy of XP with Service Pack three to integrate the two together to bring about a seamless installation.
    Mr Sharam detailed these operations, spent time researching my issues, asking specific questions to verify what it was that was causing errors that was disabling the machine from loading the OS.

    I would like to comment on the thread that Mr Cranky has so eloquently tethered. I wrote all of my questions in the forum, NOTHING was sent specifically to Mr Sharam. everything was totally out in the open. NOW when I write describing the HIGH level of professionalism I received from Mr Sharam, its as if "I" am the one that did something unprofessional a 'faux pas' if you will calling out people that first of all refused advise, (regarding the last thread asking about final loading the OS) secondly now its over and done with, giving some type of pitiful excuse as to 'why' they refused suggestions.

    It has been said that loose lips have sunk battleships. What I've always read into that statement is that not so much one should keep his mouth shut to keep from sinking a battleship but that when attempting to be constructive the lips should not be 'loose' ie, before putting ones mouth in gear the brain should be consulted.
    This forum purpose as I understand it is to put together a place for people to come with computer technical questions. The creators of this forum are here obviously to garner some type of compensation from advertisers and those that would seek their expertise when it comes to recommendations.
    To put it bluntly the website is here primarily as a vehicle for one or more people to make a profit from this encounter. Obviously the secondary purpose of the website is to help those people that do not have the answers they seek when asking questions of the professionals here.
    That being said, it would seem logical that when one chooses to offer suggestions to those less technologically advanced, that the feedback be given in a straight forward presentation. It goes without saying that the questions that some may have could seem ridiculous (where is the 'any key'?) and in the same breath so much of the world is this way. ( I learned this week that a 'formulary' is something that an insurance company will send to a pharmacist describing prescription details)
    I would like to suggest that the feedback be given in a straight forward manner disabling those that choose to use this forum for purposes other than that of providing useful helpful direction to those that have not spent their lives researching computer issues. To 'grin and bear it' when one such as CaptainCranky feels the need to tee off on someone, simply because this person inadvertently made the error of sharing what it is that he does for a living, is crazy preposterous that this would have anything to do with the questions that were leveled or the manner in which the thread was constructed.

    In conclusion I would ask simply this of the TechSpot creators, Learn from this experience if there is obvious sarcasm which in no way is suggesting directness being confused with sarcasm, this should NOT be tolerated. I do not see any point or level of constructiveness that may be garnered from sarcasm. If there is a question that is asked it should be answered in the same manner in which it is asked. To complain about ones need for a baby sitter. To complain about how many times a question may have been asked that seemed as if it had already been answered is of no value to anyone.
    I think I have made the point I came to make.
  9. captaincranky

    captaincranky TechSpot Addict Posts: 13,006   +2,532

    Is This an Official Reprimand......?

    Seriously though, thanks for the new cliche "loose lips sink ships". I hope you don't mind me pinching it from time to time.

    There are countless threads here at TS that always state don't update the BIOS unless it's necessary. Since I bought my GA EP45-UD3R from Newegg before (I believe) you purchased yours, and it came with the version F4 BIOS,no updating was necessary My E7300 CPU was plug and play. The E7300 is a newer CPU than the one you installed. So, if anything it should have required a BIOS update, no so however. Oh, XP was PnP also!
    Well, the motherboard SATA ports are marked, and it seems to me to be intuitive to plug the first drive into the lowest number. Or put another way, the lowest numbered yellow port that the plug will fit into.This assumes that we can agree that zero is a lower number than one. At least for the purposes of this discussion. (Obviously, it could be argued that zero is not actually a number, and I've come to expect the unexpected from you). OK, Gigabyte provides 6 primary SATA ports on that particular board! They also provide (4) SATA connecting cables, which are likewise colored bright yellow! Prima facie, this seems to be at a kindergarten level, plug the yellow cables, into the yellow jacks. Here again, I don't feel the slightest inclination to apologize for pointing that out. I suppose that's another personal failure I'll have to live with. What do I know, I thought the system was ***** proof, but that's just didn't pan out. Pan out, hey that's a gold rush cliche.
    Here again, you seem to be trying to overcomplicate the issue. No, it isn't necessary to slipstream SP3 into XP, especially while doing a clean install. Simply install XP with SP2, hook up to the internet, and activate Windows
    (which you must do anyway), let them install WGA, (which you have to do anyway, at least if you ever want another software update from M$) Then download the approximately 66MB differential SP3 update directly from M$ and let them install it for you. Works like a charm, I say this from personal experience. BTW, I abundantly don't care if somebody else thinks their way is better, that method works like a charm and didn't involve any typing on my part.

    So here, whether you choose to believe me or not, or whether you like my tone or not, it seems that you have created any problems you encountered yourself.

    Since advice is free here, allow me the offer thereof, next time you "dredge" up a cliche like "loose lips sink ships", it might be a good thing to look down to see if your shoes are getting wet. I tried to maintain that tidbit in keeping with our "nautical" theme. Oh, and save all your scolding, pouting, and pedantic lectures on manners and entitlement of treatment for somebody that cares. I say you reap what you sow, but I could be wrong. You know what they say, "like poles repel"! (Here is a cliche based on science fact, yet cleverly adapted to the field of human interaction. Wait, "field", that could be a magnetic field. Wow, jeeze, that cuts both ways also).

    Another little nautical humorette, an ex girlfriend's mother had gotten into the habit of drinking wine, so I suggested that Mum was listing from Port in addition to listing to port.
  10. BillAllen55

    BillAllen55 TS Maniac Topic Starter Posts: 368

    Prosecution rests.
  11. captaincranky

    captaincranky TechSpot Addict Posts: 13,006   +2,532

    You might want to consider practicing plugging the yellow wire into the yellow hole, before you attempt to start practicing law. Start a thread maybe.
  12. SNGX1275

    SNGX1275 TS Forces Special Posts: 10,742   +421

    The forums are a subsection of the main site, which is a PC Technology News and Reviews site. Nobody gets paid for the forums. Staff members get paid to do things for the main page, how often do you see any staff member posting on the forums? Not very often. Us mods get absolutely zero compensation for any of our efforts to keep this place running.

    I don't think you get to tell us how the forums are ran, who can post what, and what they can say. Well, sure you can tell us what you want, but we have no obligation to make that happen. These forums have been ran by the mods for at least 10 years (I've been here for over 9) and there are always people that don't like certain things, but they are an incredibly small minority. Most people that have an issue with how things are ran around here leave. You have well over 200 posts, I would have thought at this point you would have either accepted it, or left.

    Your frustration or whatever it is with us perplexes me. There are countless other places to get free help online. There are also places to pay for help, if you pay for help I think at that point you can demand a level of service that is up to your expectations, but like other things, if you don't like the level of service you are getting you take your money elsewhere. Here you obviously aren't paying for the help, and we aren't getting anything from you in return for helping.

    As I said there are countless places to get help online, most are community based. Each community has some degree(s) of specialization, perhaps the overall knowledge level here demands a bit more out of the poster than other places. Maybe you'd be better off at those other places. There are certainly forums that demand more knowledge than we do, for example, I think if you had a hard drive question, a place like storagereview's forums is probably better to answer it than here, but you better show up knowing as much as possible about your problem, whereas here you can probably get by asking the same question with less background.

    Long story short. You obviously take offense to how your questions get solved around here, rather than wasting your time and ours with complaints, just go somewhere else. No sense in you not liking it here, and no sense in us trying to change what has worked for years.
  13. jobeard

    jobeard TS Ambassador Posts: 11,161   +986

    It is one thing to be good at technical issue -- quite another to be a good teacher. Somehow there are too many that exclaim (self-evident by their tone and replies) -- "boy that's a dumb question!"

    In reality there are only dumb answers. When the teacher can not longer relate to the mind set of the student, it's time to retire.
    oops! -- see how easy it is to regress :wink:

    THANK YOU for reminding us that progress and growth comes to us all by polite and effective criticism from others.
  14. hellokitty[hk]

    hellokitty[hk] Hello, nice to meet you! Posts: 3,448   +145

    heh, very real, I sometimes do that :p.

    Anyway, the worst posts i've seen are simply posts with bad grammer and ridiculous web slang (plz help me i cant w8t 4 teh virus scaner 2 finish), I havn't really seen any inappropriate or impolite posts.
  15. kimsland

    kimsland Ex-TechSpotter Posts: 14,523

  16. captaincranky

    captaincranky TechSpot Addict Posts: 13,006   +2,532


    Actually, I take offense at this. I don't think it's necessary for a teacher to adapt to whatever frivolous, capricious mind set lurks within the depths of any or every students mind. If any of that was anywhere near true, there would be no need for the grade of "F" and every teacher would bear all of the emotional and social burden for every under performing, inattentive, dilettante student which society might thrust upon him. If poetic justice were ever to be invoked then your livelyhood, would depend on achieving a 100% success rate or out you go! See ya! Next!

    Incidentally, it seems sort grandiose to pontificate about threads and members which until now you haven't deemed fit to have contact with or participate in. But, as always that's just my worthless personal opinion. My tired, annoyed, should retire personal opinion.

    Actually, I think SNGX1275 pretty much hit the nail on the head. In any biological sense an organism which attains it's sustinence by feeding off another while contributing nothing, can only be considered a parasite.

    If it's your position that the only path to true Techspot bliss, is catering unquestioningly to the whims and demands of those passerbys who stop by looking for free advice, without any investment of self effort, then by all means, when I'm tempted to try and assist someone, I'll PM you and you can achieve a hat trick moral victory by, solving their problem, sparing them my wrath, all while showing me how it's done. Me, I'll guess I'll suffer the shame and anguish of not having to type.

    Better still, let's let BillAllen55 run the forum and field all the questions for a while, just so he can show us his hearts in the right place, and that he's not just all about entitlement, taking, and complaining.
  17. bobcat

    bobcat TechSpot Paladin Posts: 688   +67

    I clarify that I don’t take part in the actual case involved here. It’s not my affair and I don’t have the facts, while the case is dealt with by those duly authorised. My position for anybody (the word may be nobody) interested, is that I support politeness from the part of everybody, but also gratitude for help offered.

    However, I can’t help being attracted by captaincranky’s literary escapades in the realm of clichés, and for his perusal, I have drafted the following metaphor:

    You aren’t even supposed to look a gift horse in the mouth, let alone level accusations against its donor if what you see in the mouth isn’t to your liking. Far from offering you a better horse, he has now probably regretted having given you the old one. Moreover, you don’t have to stick around his stable. But if you do, don’t be surprised if further gift horses don’t seem to come so readily your way.

    As regards dumb questions and answers, I have the following quote in my collection, which I reproduce because I consider it witty, not because I necessarily endorse it:

    If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?
    (Scott Adams)

    The linked thread should be referenced as a classic, both for instruction and amusement. Thanks for starting my week with a good laugh. :)

    And here is the relevant cliché:

    Nobody is useless, he can always serve as a bad example.
  18. halo71

    halo71 TS Rookie Posts: 1,090

    Ahhh, haven't been here in forever. Things still the same I see. And yeah, I usually tend to like reading the Captain's posts!
  19. captaincranky

    captaincranky TechSpot Addict Posts: 13,006   +2,532

    I'm interested Bobcat, swear to Jim. (I'm an agnostic so I just draw a random name).
    Thank you so much for explaining this in detail.It's all clear to me now. So this is why Santa has been bringing me stockings full of horse poop for as long as I can remember.

    Now, that's definitely a trick question, I'm certain of this because my head exploded after I read it. Thank you sir, may I please have another. (It's always good to say "please and thank you").

    Actually, I gave that considerable thought and I came up with this; no the questions are stupid on purpose, that much is planned in advance.
    I pasted the entire thread into a folder and dragged it across the Winzip icon, tragically, still nthin'! Pat, I'd like to buy a vowel! (Please).

    I'm sure my behavior here has nullified my chances for a TS letter of referral to the Utopia School District. I soooo had my heart set on teaching Girls Gym.

    And Bobcat, thanks for starting my week off with a roaring Laugh
  20. Rage_3K_Moiz

    Rage_3K_Moiz Sith Lord Posts: 5,443   +38

    Why is it not easy? I have seen tons of new threads where people make it clear that they are not very good with computers or have limited experience with them. There are probably some sitting around the forum right now. It is as easy as typing it all out! After all, it's not like you are face-to-face with someone, which is obviously far harder.

    As for explanations, those take time to type and it is usually much easier to refer someone to a webpage that carries it, albeit only if the page in question actually has a detailed, user-friendly explanation.

    Also, a lot of problems in the majority of the threads around here can be solved if the thread creators take the time to search the forums for an older thread dealing with the issue in question. This is extremely rare to see however. And a little homework of your own never goes to waste, unless you absolutely cannot comprehend the information in front of you, in which case you just need to ASK!

    Unfortunately, the way in which you ask does matter, and if you choose to speak l33t or blow up when someone suggests searching first or not double-posting, then go look somewhere else for help.

    All of us help by choice; no strings attached.
  21. bobcat

    bobcat TechSpot Paladin Posts: 688   +67


    I am not sure how you took my quotes and what you meant by many of your replies, which may well constitute a dumb question on my part. My writings were intended for you to comment on, but were not directed against you. In particular, the horse metaphor referred to members turning against their advisors and you are one of the latter, not the former.

    In return for the entertainment you provide us, I’ll give you several, free on the house:

    There are no stupid questions but there are a lot of inquisitive *****s. (unknown)
    A wise man's question contains half the answer. (Solomon Ibn Gabriel)
    The greatest fool may ask more than the wisest man can answer. (Charles Caleb Colton)
    When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts," and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?
    If something is obvious, but you still ask why, you won’t understand the answer either.
  22. captaincranky

    captaincranky TechSpot Addict Posts: 13,006   +2,532

    The Horse Was Here, but Now He's Gone, He Left This P**P to Carry On

    No, I took no meaning aimed at me from your observations, of that you can be certain. The "poop in the stocking" motif was self deprecating humor, provided for (hopefully) everyones entertainment. The train of thought behind that was an extension of the, "no longer get offered the horse" line of reasoning you presented. I fantasized that if an individual complained enough about a gift horse, that this might result in only that horse's s*** being offered in the future. A simple morality fable about cause and effect relationships, hinged on the Christmas Stocking metaphor, nothing more. As to "thank you sir, may I have another", I was laughing so hard at your post :haha:, I was parodying it as a recruit asking his drill instructor for more punishment. I meant what exactly what I said about thanks for starting my week off with a roaring good laugh!

    This sounds like it might be either George Carlin or even more so Rita Rudner, it's certainly in her style
    One of her gems for comparison's sake; "If you add flour and water together you get wallpaper paste, but then when you add sugar, you get cake, where does the glue go"?
  23. bobcat

    bobcat TechSpot Paladin Posts: 688   +67

    Now, this is becoming a highly entertaining thread. It may be getting ever so slightly off topic, but the latter has more or less been settled by SNGX1275’s statement. Besides, it’s a Meeting Spot here.

    Thanks for the glue riddle. I tried to figure it out but…got stuck.

    However, it did remind me of some further riddles.

    First of all, being a cat, I have the following queries:

    • Why isn't there mouse-flavoured cat food?
    • If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?
    (Steven Wright)

    Linguistics, our alternative topic here, is also a rich source of head-scratching paradoxes:

    • Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight?
    (George Carlin)
    • Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do practice?
    • Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

    Finally, there’s this one on computers:

    • If a trainstation is where the train stops, what's a workstation...?

    However, I’m too lazy to work out the answer, while sitting in front of my workstation. :)

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