Online gaming can lead to lasting friendships, and much more

Shawn Knight

Posts: 14,330   +163
Staff member
Up for discussion: Online gaming is a pastime that many of us enjoy but for some, it can lead to lifelong bonds, romantic encounters and even marriage. Have you ever met someone special while gaming or know somebody that has? Feel free to chime in below!

I often turn to the Holstee Manifesto for inspiration. One particular line in the motivational poster – a framed copy of which hangs in my office at my nine o’clock – stands out. “If you are looking for the love of your life, stop; they will be waiting for you when you start doing things you love.”

One of the activities that I know a lot of TechSpot readers are into is online gaming and according to a recent survey from PubNub, it’s not uncommon for relationships of all sorts to blossom through this common interest.

In a survey of 500 gamers, PubNub found that 36 percent of respondents developed a lifelong friend through chat while gaming. More than 20 percent of those friendships have lasted at least five years and over three percent have persisted for more than two decades.

A full eight percent said they have found marriage or partnership via conversations had while gaming and 10 percent even admitted to having an affair that was sparked by gaming chat.

Monika Jurczyńska, a lifelong gamer and graphic designer, met her boyfriend of five years while playing Quake Live. “We now live together after I moved to Finland to be with him. The connection we have is strong, and if it wasn’t for the ability to chat through gaming, we never would have met and formed the bond we now have,” she said.

Whether or not a game offers a sound chat infrastructure can impact its overall success, too. More than 33 percent of players polled said good chat functionality can affect the likelihood of them playing a game.

Image credit: Guy and Girl courtesy aslysun

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Posts: 429   +285
I only play online games with my friends and apparently they are the closest friends I have got :D. Nothing beat friendships that last through those rough DOTA ranked matches.


Posts: 429   +149
Back in 2005ish, I met 3 people online playing the old school dota. They were actually local and we met up for lunch and for snowboarding trips. Fast forward 15 years, marriage, kids, and moving away are the new norm but yet we still keep in touch.

Cal Jeffrey

Posts: 3,576   +1,075
Staff member
I have not developed any lasting friendships through online gaming, but to be fair, I don't do much online gaming. I'm more the loner type when playing. I like single player games the most.

That said, I have developed many lasting friendships via other online platforms.I have been telecommuting for work since 2008. I have many friends who I have made through work that I still maintain contact with even though I left the job long ago and despite having never met in person. I have also formed bonds with people on Facebook (not my preferred platform). Most of these have been mutual friends of existing people I know. In some cases, I have a stronger bond with these "new" friends than the mutual friend that we share.

I cannot speak for everybody, but for me, the thing with talking with someone online versus face-to-face is I find myself being much more honest. This seems counter intuitive because it is easy to pretend that you are someone you are not online. It happens all the time, but for me that barrier of distance and being behind the wall of the internet makes me feel comfortable about opening up and sharing things I might not otherwise bring up in a face-to-face conversation. It's a strange dynamic, but interesting nonetheless.


Posts: 1,297   +1,085
My first online forte was a game called No One Lives Forever. I hosted the most stable server (even better then monolith's on a T1) through a cable modem. I had several repeat gamers and we chatted quite a bit while messing around on maps. Several of us became virtual friends and then eventually went to an IRC chat room. The game got a bit stale after a few years and we stayed in the chat channel anyway. The IRC server unexpectedly was moved to another server and nearly all of them didn't know where it went. A few of us figured it out and stayed in the chat room for several years after that. Eventually our real lives took over online time and we don't really keep in touch any more, but are still friends on steam. None of them I met in real life as they all were clear across the country or world.


Posts: 287   +201
During WotLK I got to know people in my WoW guild better then some people I've known since High School.

I met a few friends on World of Warcraft, probably 7 years ago, and we still talk to this day. Most of them were from random dungeon runs and wondering how I stacked my stats to hit 12k dps during WotLK. Armor penetration is my answer to that. No longer exists, but the whole dynamic of the game changed after that. I've met a few friends on PSN, but nothing that has really stuck so far. My closest friends are the ones I have come over and play multiple rounds of Injustice 2 and order pizza. Games are great to bond over, but I usually have to find other related interests as well. It all depends on the personality. My girlfriend doesn't play games at all except for maybe a couple phone games.


Posts: 420   +229
Very rarely do I meet anyone on line worth talking to beyond the game and the only way you can really keep track of them is adding them to social media account friend's list.
playing the wrong games. I played counterstrike competitively a long time ago, and I still know quite a few people to this day that are in Canada and other parts of the usa . games that are team based are helpful in this.


Posts: 6,308   +7,248
playing the wrong games. I played counterstrike competitively a long time ago, and I still know quite a few people to this day that are in Canada and other parts of the usa . games that are team based are helpful in this.

You're in Canada tho. You need to know as many people as you can up there.