I don't think you can use your personal experience as evidence "most often it's damage done by the user" I have a Macbook pro I used every saturday to type of a report while I was eating breakfast at a restaurant. I never used that computer for anything else. Once Covid hit and that restaurant closed I only used that computer twice and the second time I look it out of its case to see if I remembered the password the right side of the touch bar, which I would have never selected if it was optional, no longer displayed anything. I took it to Apple and they told it it would cost $1500 to fix it and it would just be better if I bought a new laptop. I sent an email to a repair service and they told it would cost $350 to replace the module.
Apple designed many of these computer to run at 90-100 degrees celsius and Apple can and will refuse to fix a computer if it's been used in a humid environment which can set off the liquid sensors. Apple wasn't going to fix replace the touchbar with a new one they were just going to replace everything and I would have lost all my settings and data if it wasn't backed up.
"If people haven't dropped them, they still look and feel like brand new computers over a decade later." Nearly everything looks and feels like brand new if it's taken care of.
I can offer my 10 years + experience as an IT Tech fixing PCs and Mac's on a regular basis. Most techs from the company I contract to don't want to touch the Mac's so I do see a lot more than most. I also build custom PC's when I’m not working for them.
In almost all circumstances I have found that Apple machines do last a long time, I regularly see clients with machines well over 5 years old still doing what they need them to do. I rarely see this from the better quality PC laptops they compete with. Yes, I have seen issues with specific year models from them, their 2016 MB Pro was an epic fail, their touch-bar to me was pointless and soldered on components made them very difficult to upgrade, out of warranty support and services are overpriced doo doo and I would never recommend using them for repair or parts replacement, but the same can also be said for other manufacturers. Thankfully we have some great 3rd party services and second-hand parts market

Every manufacturer can and does refuse repair based on what they class misuse and over the year I have seen allot worse example of this from the other premium laptop manufacturers so this is not specific to Apple.
Their new SOC design M1 is surprisingly efficient, fast and the uptake of apps being ported to run natively is good news for early adopters and the platform going forward.
How long they last is unknown at this stage but I see these new ARM-based Mac's creating a completely different type of device that is as efficient as a mobile phone with the power of desktop CPU.