I believe you struck the nail on the head. DEC Hihgher ups claimed he was "Impossible to deal with" would nearly be understated.
When I was 12 years old, my father worked for Steve at NeXT Shortly before they rolled out the NeXT Cube with 68030 procesor.
Now, my pops is a tolerant dude. Can't say I've really ever heard him talk trash about anyone, executive, or mail-room level. For my father to say that Steve was a Crybaby, tantrum throwing little child at any notion to modify or change one of his "godly" ideas on whats NeXT in Computing, well it's must have taken ALOT.
At a trade show in the early 90's in Vancouver BC (hosted at the Pan Pacific Hotel) I remember some of Steve's SE's and Senior sales people just going on and on about what the product could have been, had it had a person with great vision (Steve had great vision) and some common sense to listen to reason.
No matter how incredible the systems were at that time, its still hard to sell a computer any great number of people with a price tag that would eclipse $10k in the blink of an eye.
It was a very cool system that ultimately didn't take off because the "Crybaby In Charge" would not bend an inch on anything with the system design.
I stil have one. It's Mach OS was the lead in for OS X. The Cube I have was a prototyped 68040 model, with 2 Maxtor 660mb SCSI's, the 250mb Optical drive, and the (at that time) Gorgeous megapixel monochrome display.
I for one am sorry he passed, but I don't hold him in the same light others do.. He stomped some heads and backs on his way up, and oppressed many ideas to keep his in the limelight.
Just my $0.02,