xHamster-backed sensor hides your open windows (which may or may not contain p*rn) when...


Posts: 6,078   +50
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xHamster, a website I know nothing about but am told contains a wrist-aching amount of adult material, has joined forces with a startup to develop something people have been calling for ever since the invention of the internet: a motion sensor that minimizes all your computer’s open windows and mutes the sound when someone enters a room.

The $48 device, called Minimeyes, is still at the concept stage and is currently being crowdfunded on Indiegogo, where it has raised $807 of its $96,000 target at the time of writing.

It works by aiming the battery-operated, Bluetooth LE 4.0 device’s infrared lens in the direction that you want to monitor movement, like your bedroom door or boss’ office. When it detects someone, the minimeyes application starts running in the background, hiding all open windows and, if selected, mutes the sound. The sensor box can be placed up to 65 feet away from a computer or mobile device (it can close apps on Android and send alerts on iOS).

Use minimeyes wherever you are and whenever you don’t want your partner, your kids, your parents, your brother or sister, your teacher, your boss, your colleagues, your roommate or a perfect stranger to see or hear what you are doing on your computer or mobile device,” reads the description.

For a cheaper, slightly more low-tech solution, Minimeyes is also offering a $24 magnetic door sensor that performs the same functions when somebody opens a door.

Despite the xHamster connection, Minimeys isn’t designed solely to prevent people catching you having a ménage à un. One sensor can connect to multiple devices, allowing an entire office to hide the fact they were wasting time on Facebook when the boss walks in. But we know most people will buy one just to hide their porn viewing. The only problem is having to explain why your pants were down while looking at the ‘girl jogging on beach’ Windows wallpaper.

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When I was 14 I did this for about the cost of a sharpie. You see, what you do is prop a pen up against the door you want to monitor.

That's it.

When the door opens, the pen drops, you hide the window.

Note to would-be porn viewers: this method does not work on carpet and I assume no liability for injuries resulting from improper pen placement.

Eric Mozzone

Posts: 41   +26
Most companies run firewalls and proxies that block said websites anyways... if you really want on Facebook (or w/e), open your phone...


Posts: 16,131   +4,902
I, live alone, have discovered the venetian blind, along with heating and air conditioning, allowing doors and windows to be closed during most to all seasons of the year.

Other than that, I normally keep something like a small bottle jack to use as a doorstop, handy. My "art photography monitor" is behind the line of sight of the cracked open door. (*)

"The only problem is having to explain why your pants were down while looking at the ‘girl jogging on beach’ Windows wallpaper". @midian182 Dude, "jogging" really? My "wallpaper" does a lot more than jog, and I wouldn't be caught in anything but elastic waist pants while surfing for erotica... (I'll grant you it does help to lean forward quite a bit, when confronted with the need to answer the door, but at least, "you have pants on")...;):cool:

(*) I misspelled cracked, as "cracker". At which point I considered adding the possessive, to make the statement read, "the cracker's open door". But alas, I fear I've said too much already...:D

Uncle Al

Posts: 7,485   +5,992
Awwwww .... shoot. Invite them in! Changes are they want to see it even more than you do!


Posts: 2,001   +1,330
I find this hilarious.

And seriously must be an executive or the boss if you have time to watch porn at work lol