Car Tech Apple to buy Tesla? One entrepreneur is convinced it'll happen within 18 months

Shawn Knight

Posts: 12,996   +130
Staff member
Rumors of Apple jumping into the automotive industry have reached a dizzying frenzy over the past week or so. Between hiring up automotive experts, dedicating a significant amount of resources to a car project codenamed "Titan" and sending out minivans...

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Guest

Great, it'll make Tesla owner more difficult to repair their cars..
owner: looks like my brake calipers need replacement, please fix it
technician: well, I think it's impossible, sir, because the brake calipers itself are soldered to the car, sir.. just like macbook
 

Arris

Posts: 4,719   +447
I doubt this is really on the cards. It's been stated that Apple have been poaching Tesla staff but I'd put money on them being staff who don't have specializations particular to the automotive industry.
 
G

Guest

Does anybody really want to drive in a walled garden? Cars offer freedom - Apple offers only a prison (yes, it may be comfy, it may "just work", it may be cool, it may be design, but it is still a prison).

So, Apple buying Tesla? Please, noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
 
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davislane1

I doubt this is really on the cards. It's been stated that Apple have been poaching Tesla staff but I'd put money on them being staff who don't have specializations particular to the automotive industry.

Rumor mill has it that they are poaching engineers for an Apple minivan they have in the works.

They may need to do some serious marketing brainstorming, though. Apple's brand for non-computers is the I-SOMETHING. Seeing that BMW already has the I-MODEL nomenclature, they will have to come up with something new.

My money is on the Soccer Mom. And, of course, the variant with all the bells and whistles, the Soccer Mom Pro.
 

p3ngwin

Posts: 27   +9
I doubt this is really on the cards. It's been stated that Apple have been poaching Tesla staff but I'd put money on them being staff who don't have specializations particular to the automotive industry.

yep, also have to balance that with Tesla poaching Apple staff too :)
 

Arris

Posts: 4,719   +447
Rumor mill has it that they are poaching engineers for an Apple minivan they have in the works.

They may need to do some serious marketing brainstorming, though. Apple's brand for non-computers is the I-SOMETHING. Seeing that BMW already has the I-MODEL nomenclature, they will have to come up with something new.

My money is on the Soccer Mom. And, of course, the variant with all the bells and whistles, the Soccer Mom Pro.
Most likely a minivan priced like a Ferrari. Will you only be able to have it serviced by official iMechanics using Apple parts?
 
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davislane1

Most likely a minivan priced like a Ferrari. Will you only be able to have it serviced by official iMechanics using Apple parts?

This is Apple. It'll be priced like a mid-spec Bentley and have performance just above a Honda Odyssey. It will probably be serviceable by the average joe. Obtaining the proprietary tires and replacement wipers, special washer fluid, proprietary oil and transmission fluid, air filter UNIT, and proprietary hybrid battery charger is another story.

But I hear the in-dash touchscreen will be pretty good.
 

VitalyT

Posts: 5,414   +4,895
And what would Apple do with Tesla?...

- Replace all displays with "retina" screens;
- Re-brand all speakers as Beats;
- Change the charging socket to a new one that requires an expensive adapter;
- Put Apple logo on the car and on the steering wheel;

What else super-duper will or can they do?
 
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davislane1

And what would Apple do with Tesla?...

- Replace all displays with "retina" screens;
- Re-brand all speakers as Beats;
- Change the charging socket to a new one that requires an expensive adapter;
- Put Apple logo on the car and on the steering wheel;

What else super-duper will or can they do?

- Fingerprint keyless entry & ignition;
- Add proprietary square cup holders;
- Add fragrance atomizer a la Mercedes-Benz;
- Only provide two fragrances;
- iCloud integration;

What else super-duper wouldn't or couldn't they do?